• Diane Lawton

how to cook for the filthy rich

Updated: Sep 9

From catering college to private chef to the rich and famous



My four book fiction series, gently pokes fun at the antics of catering students, chefs, food snobs, celebrities and the over privileged, from their hot steamy designer kitchens. Nibble on some of those piquant moments from my books and lick your fingers at my saucy recipes that kept me employed for three decades.

A taster ... From


A Spanish Feast


(book 3 in the series)


Fine dining has a lot in common with sex.

I hope you are old enough to be reading this. It is not a topic often discussed over a hot range with a teenager.
One evening, as I prepared dinner for a family of indulgent celebs, the lankly teen of the family dawdled into the kitchen. He was a little tipsy after imbibing overlooked sips of expensive brandy.
He blubbered that he couldn't discuss sex with anyone ...of importance anyway. So he asked me .... "How can I get the little guy to perform better with my insatiable girlfriend?"
"sexy foods." I replied, unabashed. Having discussed this topic with boys in college on a daily basis. I had indulged in far too many nerdy books for my own goodness. I immediately made thought notes, like a doctor, deciding whether to tell his patient the truth.
"There is a lot of science behind food and sex." I hinted, holding my pen aloft, my mind remembering steamy moments in the stock room with a stick of celery and an aubergine dip. I simultaneously stirred a creamy bechemel sauce... waiting...
He looked at me under his floppy fringe with a hint of respect.
"If you need some help with the little guy..." I looked down at his trousers…… "aphrodisiac food is the way to go."
Beads of sweat glistened on his forehead. He whipped a £50 note from his silk lined Gucci wallet and he tucked it into the pocket of my chefs jacket with the practiced hand of the rich.
"I’ll send you an email..." I promised "... and some web links..."
He walked a bit taller towards the dismal portals of a parental dinner party, looking like the alpha male he would become. I was certain he would soon be enjoying a foodgasm with the lovely Arabella.
See my post: Sex Alert : The Best Aphrodisiac Foods Ever

My 5 books in the series


I am looking for an agent or publisher


Fiction

Kitchen Wars

London Capers

A Spanish Feast

The Millionaire Years


Non Fiction

Cookbook: Fingerlicking Food in minutes


#Fun #Cake #Chocolate #Sex #Cookery book #Women's Fiction #Recipes #Foodies

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